I FEEL BETTER!

Oh so better! I feel better as better can be!

My antidepressant medication is helping.

Baby it's cold outside so I just stay in most days.

A gradual warm up is due to begin!

Into The Holiday Season

I am an atheist who celebrates Christmas.

I see nothing contradictory in the above.

It now gets dark earlier in the afternoon.

But here I am! I watch various yule log television programs and I am able to do EVERYTHING!

I have made it into November Double Digits!

Of course it is as cold and snowy as January but details details!

I am using my light lamp in an effort to maintain my mood.

Here comes winter!

I wrote the above earlier in the week but failed to publish it; therefore the post day is 11/13/19!

There Was A White Halloween and White Veterans' Day

Chicago winter of 2019/2020 is definitely on a roll!

As I Approach The First Anniversary Of My Stroke...

...I am very grateful!

Well September Just Ended So Wake Me Up!

No need to; it's just after five am and I am already out of bed and on my computer.

Still getting my money's worth out of this desktop; my next machine will definitely be a laptop.

Well I accomplished September 2019; I had a lot of medical issues but I managed everything.

And now fall is arriving, the leaves will start turning, the weather will turn cooler etc. etc. etc.

I might have to moonlight; but what better time than fall and winter!

Just Out Of The Hospital

Didn't have to spend the night or get new meds!

So things went well.

Until the bill arrives....LOL I have good insurance but the company doesn't pay for everything.

No gym this weekend and it's supposed to rain.

Going to be boring.

Maybe it won't rain the entire weekend.

We shall see!

Here we go again....

I want to do a one woman show thus:

Louise Mcbride
Poignant Reflections On The Human Condition

LOL

Anything but poignant that!

:)

I OVERSLEPT!

And last night I thought I heard weird noises!

Certainly hope this doesn't develop into a pattern.

Gotta go...

Anniversaries

Today is the nineteenth anniversary of my current employment! 💀 It's been a ride but I should be glad I have the work! And no I do not believe that in this current era of modern conveniences that a SAHM is the equivalent of full-time employment!

DUCK!!!!

Also, tomorrow is the ten month "anniversary" of my stroke. I quote that word since by definition only yearly events are true anniversaries! Ten month marker is more accurate! :) So here I am still living in my same house, several months into resumption of full time work, seemingly in debt up to my proverbial neck, and meanwhile continuting to mourn the boyfriend who passed away from an opiate overdose in December.

SAD......

I will never find another relationship like that; not with that level of compatibility. And yes I do realize my modus operandi is the outlier!

Anyhow, just four more months exist between now and the beginning of the calendar year of the fifty-fifth birthday! Oh yes before I forget exactly five weeks from today I will turn fifty-four; I will be in my mid-fifties rather than my early fifties!

I began this blog in 2012 after I discovered Objectivism. More accurately after I rediscovered it; as a dumb seventeen year old the atheist aspect frightened me. Now I'm a dumb fifty-three year old. Progress?

I'll write more later. Now I need to obtain my second cup of coffee and get going to my morning's activities.

August 22

Memories from recent years:

2017: Driving home from Southern IL on our ill-fated solar eclipse trip (after sitting out in the hot stadium sun for a few hours the damn star went behind the clouds and we barely saw anything) with Dave R. He's now dead.

2018: Taking Bob Wick for his Barrett esophagus check up procedure. He's now dead.

2019: I have fully recovered from my stroke but I may soon be relieved of my job. This would not necessarily constitute hardship since management moved us down to hell and gone over a year ago. And...today I am joining a meetup group at a new trivia venue, both company and location.

Memories...AND TO THINK I WAS THERE!

Going Through August

It's all up to me.

I know it.

I just need to concentrate on accomplishing as much as I can and maintaining a good attitude.

What is my name?

My real name is not Louise!

TODAY IS JULY 31!

I have been in my current home for a full fifteen years now.

These fifteen years have not all been easy. Two cancer surgeries, a broken wrist, a stroke, a work probation period, two work suspensions, and the death of a very special loved one.

But here I am.

I believe I have all the tools necessary to negotiate through life. Luckily my recent stroke didn't rob me of any cognitive abilities, and my physical abilities are totally restored.

In a little more than two months I will achieve my fifty-fourth birthday; from my early fifties to my mid fifties!

One more step towards retirement!

But will I be happier then? Or should I concentrate on being happy now?

I am I am I am.

Today is July 1!

We are officially half way through the year.

2018 was a lousy year...a club I frequented closed in January, a problematic work relocation in April, a stroke in November, and the death of a cherished loved one in December!

Yadda yadda yadda.

But what can one do?

I will be fifty-four years old in three months.

I will no longer be in my early fifties but in my mid-fifties!

But I really enjoy being middle aged! One thing about having a rough time when one was young; once you are older you don't reminisce about the "good old days when one was young" because those days weren't that great!

Here I am and here I stand (shades of Martin Luther). He was nuts too actually.

June Is Here!

And it's definitely not busting out all over!

Actually today isn't a very good day weather wise.

Another friend of mine passed away; that's the second one in less than three months.

I am I am I am.....

FIFTEEN YEARS SINCE MY DIVORCE...

...And still hanging on in there!

MAY DAY

"When a young man's thoughts turns to lights of love"....no that isn't correct!

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Workers%27_Day]

International Workers' Day!

Looking forward to summer; hopefully this Chicagoland summer won't be quite as humid as last year.

Of course I have lost one of my greatest values.

APRIL 2019

Is shaping up well so far.

I'm nearly fully recovered from my stroke.

Yesterday was the memorial service for my loved on; his remains are now laid to rest.

Just filed my two tax returns.

Hey, bring on the warm weather; I am definitely more than ready!

MARCH AGAIN!

We have just adjusted our clocks for daylight savings time. So we lost an hour.

Today I am home and the weather is somewhat warmer; this definitely gives hope for the future!

With some luck the cold weather should gradually subside.

I DON'T KNOW IF MARCH COMES IN LIKE A LION OR A LAMB...

...But I am firmly of the opinion it comes in too soon!

Next year we will have an extra day of February so it will be better.

When it's only the twenty-sixth of the month and one realizes one only has two full days until the first day of the next month...panic!

Well maybe not exactly panic but it can definitely be nerve racking.

Then there's good old All Fools' Day to look forward to on April 1; I really do not care for practical jokes and pranks! In my opinion such thing are inconsiderate and childish.

NOT "childlike" but CHILDISH!

I tried to insert a frowning emoji on the above line but the software was uncooperative. Or I am too inpatient. Or probably both! ;)

Into February....

...And the proverbial groundhog has come and gone.

Bad winter weather, now it is warm, Chicagoland is expecting an ice storm later today.

I am enjoying being home but I must resume work soon.

Dealing With The Drug Death Of A Loved One

https://deserthopetreatment.com/taking-multiple-drugs/mixing-fentanyl/

I will never know why he started using again.

I was shocked beyond belief at the following: "Cause of Death: Heroin and Fentanyl Toxicity."

Good thing the mail didn't come before I left for the opera; that would have destroyed my whole evening and the cold weather was challenging enough.

And to have to deal with this situation during stroke recovery.

I am obviously not hopelessly addicted to alcohol since I have all but given it up since my Dec. 18 discharge from the rehabilitation hospital. Hey, being on the wagon is good for the pocketbook; one can really save a lot of money.

I intensely dislike not having all the answers, not knowing, why did this happen, why did the dominoes roll this way and not the other, etc. etc. and so forth!

My Stroke Recovery Continues

Yes, I feel like I have been "born again."

My stroke occurred November 6. It was December when I was actually able to propel myself in the wheelchair to my rehabilitation hospital wastebasket!

Now it is cold out and I go outside. My right side really suffers. I need to look in my closet for heavy mittens or gloves.

I am only fifty-three years old and I am the family member who maintains the healthy exercising lifestyle.

WHY THE HELL AM I THE ONE WHO GETS CANCER AND A STROKE?

I am not as angry as I was during my last health issue; actually I am not angry at all. Maybe because I am older.

Who knows.

I am trying to spend as much of my online time on the PC so I can get practice typing. My right hand still isn't one hundred percent. Hopefully practice will really make perfect!

NEW YEAR 2019!

I am on my way towards a fully recovery!

Of course that means I will have to resume work sometime this year.

"This year" meaning 2019 of course.

What one take for granted....being able to drive, eat and use the toilet!

I should consider myself fortunate; there are other health issues in the family.

And it's winter too!